The Dogs On Mainstreet Howl

BecauseTheyUnderstand
PromisedLandVille

I just got back from bloody Ottawa where it was actually warmer than it is in Vancouver.

But screw the warming.

Because this freakish weather business looks like a global warning to me, in more ways than one.

Or even a thousand.

Anyway, the cigar tube-assisted trip to the Nation's Capital (of hubris) was a science-geek thing where I was forced to sit with a bunch of fellow obsessive/compulsives for three days straight so that we could bash each other's grants, and each other, up the side of the head for 16 hours at a stretch.

Kind of like waterboarding with sharp sticks, no water, and very bad coffee.

Usually we are stuck in hotel basement bunker rooms. This time, for some strange, unfathomable reason, we were deposited in a 27th floor room right under the revolving rooftop restaurant on Kent St. As a result, every 30 minutes or so we spun around and came face-to-face with the clock tower (the rest of the time we could see the billowing of the pulpmill smokestacks across the river in Hull that obscured the Museum of Civilization.....).

At about 7pm Monday night the few amongst us who are even aware that there actually is an outside world (not a normal characterstic amongst sci-geeks) noticed the small white puffs rising from one of Parliament's many chimneys just as the caterwauling began.....

And a scant five minutes later, if you looked very carefully, you could see the beasts begin their sprint for the river looking for fresh blood and raw bones to gnaw on....and those were just the advance men....somewhere off in the distance I was sure I could hear the joyful hooting of Warren Kinsella...but I could have been mistaken.

By the way, Ottawa cab drivers routinely kill people....they are insane.

And five and a half hours with Robert Milton's minions constantly trying to sell you 5 dollar cup-a-soups on the cigar tube ride home is enough to drive just about anyone crazy.

But who cares. After all, January 23rd is far off in the distance beyond the Holiday (take that Bill O'Lielly) Horizon.

And Paulie is doomed anyway....Even Bono has grown tired of him now.

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