Families Can't Eat Fireworks

Vancouver, British Columbia
49°15' North; 123°08' West

The apparently no-longer-feral Mr. Gary Collins has good news for all British Columbians.

We are now running $2Billion surplus.

Now, never mind the massive short-term bulge in commodity exports that produced the flashpowder for this surplus.

And whatever you do, don't consider the one time Federal Gov't windfall that is the fuse that has been inserted into this surplus

And most of all, do not even think about the fact that it has been the sales of hard assets that we will have to rent back until after we're all dead that gave Mr. Collins the matches to light a fire under this surplus.

Because it's Mr. Collins job to make us forget all those things while he uses them to orchestrate the blindingly bright, but very short-lived, fireworks show exploding high above the SS Gordon Campbell.

It is a spectacle that is being taped even as write this so that it can be re-played over and over and over again during the Ad-Blitz that will run non-stop from now until election day.

****

Why does this no substance flash across our horizon bug me so much?

Because I have seen, up close and personal, just how mean-spirited and bullying Mr. Campbell's regime has been in simultaneously carrying out its dubious social agenda.

Specifically, I volunteer with a small time non-profit agency that families get by when they need help.

Well, actually that is 'used to' help poor families.

Why the past tense?

Because last fall, just as it was being revealed that the Ministry of Child and Family Services had cut/slashed/wasted tens of millions of dollars, we, like hundreds of other similar small non-profit social service agencies, had our funding cut off completely.

And how much did Mr. Campbell get to steal for his fireworks show to kill us off and deprive hundreds of families of needed services that we supported?

A grand total of a lousy $28,000 dollars per year.

That goes into two billion about 71, 429 times.

Which works out to a whole lot of families, and old people, and disabled people, and hungry people, and sick people, and just plain people that have been robbed of goods and services for no good reason at all.

So, please excuse me if I refuse to watch the show.

SkimmingTheSurface

Vancouver, British Columbia
49°15' North; 123°08' West

Random thoughts from a time-challenged map watcher.....

The Santa Day Parade in downtown Vancouver last weekend was a good idea but it came too early in the season and it runs too long. Our kids liked it anyway.....

The Ukrainian election, which has been severely criticized by international observers, in part because of the discrepancy between exit polls and the '0fficial' result, was won by the incumbent's hand-picked successor by about 3%...... Coincidence?........

Does anybody actually think that Carolyn Parrish now has less power as a free voting independent who can hold a sword over the neck of the government on a close vote compared to when she was a forced to cowtow as a Liberal backbencher?.....

We are being forced to go to Ottawa next week which is bad enough, in and of itself, given the time of the year. However, there is another delegation arriving in the Nation's capital one of our travelling days..... Will be be trapped forever at Ottawa International?..... Will be stuck in a traffic jam and miss a plane because all the roads are blocked for a passing Humvee-assisted motorcade?...... Will we get a chance to turn our back on a visiting potentate with a smirk?..... Stay tuned......

Underfoot, Undermind

Santiago, Chile
33° 23' South; 70° 47' West

So, Paul Martin met Mr. Bush today in Santiago to talk beef-flowing borders and soft-wood lumbertrucks.

Which is all well and good, we guess.

But what we're really wondering is, did any of the smart young alecks from the PMO discreetly pick the following up on their PDA's while the the Boss was confabbing.

"Bring 'em on.....I'll crush him underfoot like a George Bush Doll."*

To know for sure look for the smirking one, not Shrub, standing behind Our Paul in the post-meet scrum on the uncut footage from Newsworld.

* uttered by the Content Factory on CBC Radio One's round up of all things parliamentary, 'The House" this am just as the Soft Wood Heads of State were entering the boardroom. Don't forget Santiago is right under T.O. (79°, 24' West) in the same time zone, so it coulda happened.

Smart State, Dumb State?

Hartford Connecticut
41° 44' North; 72° 44' West

A lot of ink has been spilled trying to explain how Cheney/Rove '04 managed to conquer all those Red States.

One theory that is starting to gain some traction is the IQ factor.

Which is just as dumb, but not dumber, than any of the other high-falutin', values-laden explanations.

And it just might explain why Lincoln was right about being able to fool some of the people all of the time....

But Do They Have a Stockwell Day?

Pensacola, Florida
30°28' North; 87° 12' West

Or, put another way, do they have a day just for Stockwell?

At a park called Dinosaur Adventure Land, run by creationists near Pensacola, Florida, visitors are informed that man coexisted with dinosaurs. This fantasy accommodates the creationists’ view that the Earth is only 6,000 years old and that Darwin’s theory of evolution is false. Among the park exhibits is one that illustrates another creationist article of faith. It consists of a long trough filled with sand and fitted at one end with a water spigot. Above the trough is a sign reading “That River Didn’t Make That Canyon.” When visitors open the spigot, the water quickly cuts a gully through the sand, supposedly demonstrating how the Grand Canyon was created, practically overnight, by Noah’s flood. That’s nonsense, of course, but what else would you expect at a creationist park?

And wetsuits?

Well, perhaps they were being worn by the folks that sea-dooed across the flood plain to check out that big-bang thing that happened 6001 years ago.

Don't Judge a Book By Its Jersey

Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
39° 52' North; 75° 14' West

Rabid American NFL football fans are all knuckle-dragging, whacked-out mouthbreathers, right?

Wrong.

Twins Ahoy

New York, New York
40° 44' North; 73° 44' West


Sorry, couldn't resist this bit of silly gossip:

'Freemans, tuesday night the 16th of nov.....
....the bush twins along with 2 massive secret service men tried to have dinner they were told by the maitre 'd that they were full and would be for the next 4 years upon hearing the entire restaurant cheered and did a round of shots it was amazing!!! [Ed: We're hearing that this is actually true.]'

Most Peculiar Momma

An Undisclosed Location
Nowhereville USA

Has the US vote count dike started to crack?

"Professor Steven Freeman, a statistician at the University of Pennsylvania, offers a disturbing answer. Looking at the exit polls and announced results in Ohio, Florida, and Pennsylvania, he concludes that the odds against such an accidental discrepancy in all three states together was 250 million to one"

And then there is the business with the Florida 'polling-tapes':

A "poll tape" is the phrase used to describe a printout from an optical scan voting machine made the evening of an election, after the machine has read all the ballots and crunched the numbers on its internal computer.......

"We caught the whole thing on videotape," she (Kathleen Wynne, a www.blackboxvoting.org investigator) said. "I don't think you'll ever see anything like this - Bev Harris having a tug of war with an election worker over a bag of garbage, and he held onto it and she pulled on it, and it split right open, spilling out those poll tapes. They were throwing away our democracy, and Bev wasn't going to let them do it."

Which just might explain the analysis from UC Berkeley that concludes that electronic voting machines gave Mr. Bush at least 100,000 extra votes.

Of course there are other academic opinions that counter the folks from Penn and Berkeley, opinions that led the NY Times to trash the notion of peculiarity out of hand (funny that they never used alternative sources to discredit Ahmed Chalabi, but that's another story I guess).

But, if there really is nothing to the Voter story, why are the Freepers and the Wingnuts going hard after Keith Olbermann, the only American talking head who has dared to even, well, talk about the 'I'* word?



*I = irregularity

The Minors Come Through

Vancouver, British Columbia
49°15' North; 123°08' West

My wife's favorite minor league baseball player of all time, Steve Springer, once said that it's not the spectacular that separates the minors from the majors, but rather the consistency.

And Mr. Springer knows of what he speaks, seeing as how spent 11 years and more than 1000 games at AAA and less than 10 in the big leagues.

It's the same for the newspaper business.

Sort of.

The difference is that 'round here consistency in the major dailies is of the crap variety.

Witness the Vancouver Sun, if you must.

Every once in a while though, one of the CanWest Juniors comes through in the clutch.

Case in point, yesterday's Nov. 17th Vancouver Courier Op/Ed pages. You can find it all here, but if you live in Vancouver dig it out of the bottom of the birdcage and have a look at the full spread; it's better that way.

First, an interesting piece from Allen Garr who describes how one of his Langara College journalism students was roughed up by a couple of Vancouver's finest while interviewing squeegee kids. Garr then makes a convincing case that no amount of high priced spin control can hide the fact that things have gone downhill on Chief Jamie Graham's watch.

Next, is a great take from Barry Link on how we have nothing to fear from the emergence of China as an economic superpower and it's influence on our ever changing city. It's a story of hope and, maybe, future glory.

Even the letters are great. All are well informed, well reasoned, interesting and deal with a wide range of topics that include: how STV could really work for the better; how Arts coverage can be improved; what the Canadian Club does; why we should bite the bullet and wean ourselves from U.S. dependence; and, my favorite, a treatise on coffee geeks and what it means to be 'cupped' in bean-freak parlance.

In short, it's a cosmopolitan smorgasboard that feeds the mind.

Good stuff, indeed.

What's Not To Like?

Ottawa, ON
45° 19' North; 75° 40' West

So, Paul 'Who Me?' Martin has finally decided to kick Carolyn Parrish out of the Liberal caucus.

The question is, why?

After all, who in their right mind would argue that Mr Bush is not "War-Like"?

Playing the Canadian Card

Washington, District of Columbia
38° 53' North; 77° 02' West

Intrepid White House correspondent Russell Mokhiber once again nails Bu$hCo mouthpiece little Scottie McLellan, this time by playing the Canadian 'indictment' card:

Mokhiber: Kofi Annan in September said that the Iraq war is an illegal war. If it is an illegal war, then the 100,000 who have died there – according to the Johns Hopkins School of Public Health – are victims of war crimes. Now, the President is going to Canada later this year. And the largest circulation newspaper in Canada (the Toronto Star) printed a column yesterday titled “Should Canada Indict Bush?” – raising the question of a war crimes prosecution. They have a war crimes law in Canada. And I’m wondering –

Scott McLellan: Do you have a question or is it just a statement of opinion?

Mokhiber: No, this is the question. Has the White House counsel looked at the President’s legal exposure to a war crimes prosecution?

Scott McLellan: It is a ridiculous question that you bring up. You were out on the Nader campaign at the time that this issue came up. It was addressed at that time. And I’m not going to go through it again.

Perhaps Scottie has been trapped in Jimmy Darren's Time Tunnel for the last two weeks, because, as far as we know, the Nader campaign ended long before 'yesterday' which, as Mr. Mokhiber rightly points out, was when the Star piece by Tom Walkhom was published.

Paging Dick Morris

Kitimat, British Columbia
54° 01' North; 128° 42' West

In our last post we suggested that the Cruise Line Operators with the deep pockets will soon be bringing in hired guns with media blow torches from down south to patch up the gaping holes in the rusting hull of the SS Gordon Campbell.

Of course, before that can happen the Money Men have to put their own lackeys in place to provide local cover.

Well, it looks like chief fixer, but never lobbyist, Patrick Kinsella and organ grinder Gary Collins have already started the ball rolling by hiring on homegrown 'advisors' Jess Ketchum and Greg Lyle.

Sean Holman has the whole story.

Suffice it to say, Ketchum truly is a full-fledged longtime local flack who most recently has not been aversely affected by CN's privatization of BC Rail routes. Mr. Lyle on the other hand is in the demonology business given that he has studied wide-eyed on bended knee at the foot of the bi-national Axis of Evil man himself, David Frum.

And these days neandercon demons come in all shapes and sizes, just ask 'Big Labour'.

____
From the Big Book of Neandercon Definitions....
Morris, Dick (n.): mercenary, hired gun; willing to say anything/ do anything to continue spouting ever shifting opinions of utter expediency on FOX News.

Mutiny on the Gordo, Part III

Victoria, B.C.
48° 39' West; 123° 26' West


If you were to pay attention only to the mainstream media including, sadly, the CBC, you might come to the conclusion that today's release of the report by the 'Select Standing Committee on Finance and Government Services' (warning: pdf) is an indicator that the SS Gordon Campbell has battened down the hatches in preparation for a concerted, all hands on deck, change of course.

But if you dig a little deeper, or read Schreck, you might come to a slightly different conclusion, especially given the fact that Joy McPhail was a contributor to the report.

Because clearly there are a significant number of Liberal backbenchers, particularly those outside the Lower Mainland, that are scared crapless about being thrown overboard come May 2005. As such, they are screaming for the skipper to ignore the owners of the Cruise Line, at least for the time being, and pull hard to port (ie. left) to save their skins. Why else would they say that:

"....the government spend more on a wide range of social programs, health care and education in the next provincial budget."

Of course, this type of talk is nothing short of mutiny for a Commander bent on the total dismantling of the social safety net.

So the question is, will Gordo keep up the Cap'n Queeg act, or does he order the Ferret to fire up the $30 million Whirlitzer and start doling out dollups of very little substance that do nothing but grab headlines without actually helping anybody or anything?

Call us cynics, but we figure our Fearless Leader, or more precisely his surely soon to be hired U.S. Republican battle-hardended Handlers, will surely find a way to bash social programs while simultaneously using them as a feel good success story in the run-up to the campaign.

Example.....can't wait to find out what our not-quite homegrown version of the 'No Child Left Behind' act will be. Perhaps having today's grade 7 students take yesterday's grade 4 evaluation exam all over again to demonstrate just how much they've progressed in the three years they've been in Gordo's bareknuckle, bootstrap school system?

Evil Will Triumph If....

Ottawa, ON
45° 19' North; 75° 40' West

Sometimes a country has gotta do what a country has gotta do.

One Nation Under Godzilla

Spokane, WA
47° 40' North; 117° 23' West

Because if it was, there would be no reason for holy wars.

Which is one of the reasons why the folks who came up with American Constitution worked so hard to keep church and state truly separate.

Who's Sorry Now?

49° 00' Horizontal and Down
(not including the stuff on the edges)

Matthew Good is taking things to the mat on the We're Sorry vs. We're Not Sorry website issue.

The question is, what kind of society produces examples of the latter, particularly a society that contains a significant proportion of the population and an entire government that finds such displays moral and just?

_____
Update: Mr. Good got tired of the gun barrels and took his post down, so you'll have to make do with some very manly satire from the General if you wish to pursue this matter further.

Collective Punishment

Fallujah Iraq
33° 28' North; 48° 48' East

Pepe Escobar, writing in the Asia Times, has an interesting take on the situation in Fallujah:

" ...Whenever a neo-colonial power - or a puppet politician like interim Iraqi Premier Iyad Allawi - orders the widespread bombing of civilian areas, as in Fallujah, the rationale invoked is 'regrettable necessity'. What is never mentioned is the real objective: collective punishment."

It's a harsh conclusion because, if it is true there is little separate the current American administration and their 'Saddam without a mustache' Mr. Allawi from the worst of history's tyrants which is why it is forbidden by article 33 of that quaint little document, the Geneva convention, which states:

"No protected person may be punished for an offense he or she has not personally committed," and "collective penalties and likewise all measures of intimidation or of terrorism are prohibited."

Note how the term terrorism has been turned on its head by BushCo and its minions.

____
For more Escobar, which is very good, go here.

A 'significant' number....

Fallujah Iraq
33° 28' North; 48° 48' East

The first fuzzy reports on the dead and the maimed are finally starting to trickle out....

"The full cost of the battle of Falluja emerged last night as large numbers of wounded civilians were evacuated to hospitals in Baghdad, as insurgents stepped up retaliatory attacks in other cities.

As the first Red Crescent aid convoy was allowed into Falluja, Iraq's Health Minister, Alaa Alwan, said ambulances had begun transferring a 'significant number' of injured civilians out of the battle zone, although he did not specify how many...."

So, just what is significant?

Tens?

Hundreds?

Thousands?

We would like to suggest that one is a million too many for something as useless as shock and awe footage on FOX News.

Public Service Announcement #1

Rabbleville, Canadiana
49° 00' North and Above, On a Line

Hate those bloody subscription firewalls that keep you from finding columnists that matter?

Or just want to be able to find the good ones all in one place.

Then check out the the Rabble's columnist page.

Ms. Mallick is there now too.

And Naomi Klein's latest is required reading. Who knew that a Canadian would become the next Sy Hersh?

Quaintness In Geneva

Geneva, Switzerland
46° 20' North; 06° 01' East

Looks like somebody has decided to try and hold the Butchers of BushCo accountable:

"WASHINGTON, Nov. 12 - Human rights experts said Friday that American soldiers might have committed a war crime on Thursday when they sent fleeing Iraqi civilians back into Falluja.

Citing several articles of the Geneva Conventions, the experts said recognized laws of war require military forces to protect civilians as refugees and forbid returning them to a combat zone....

....James Ross, senior legal adviser to Human Rights Watch, said, "If that's what happened, it would be a war crime."

Apparently, however, butchery is non-issue due to the 'research and vetting' edict:

"...A Defense Department spokesman, Lt. Cmdr. Joe Carpenter, defended the actions of American troops in Iraq, saying: "Our forces over there are not haphazardly operating indiscriminately, targeting individuals or civilians. The rules of engagement are researched and vetted, and our forces closely follow them."

So, our question is, does the research and vetting edict have anything in common with the memo about the quaintness of the Geneva Conventions?

_____
Thanks to sic transit gloria USA posting on moonofalabama for the link.

He Loves the Stench of Death On a Saturday

Washington, District of Columbia
38° 53' North; 77° 02' West

From the faithful waterboys over at the Associated Press via Atrios:

"In his weekly radio address, Bush applauded the assault on Fallujah, west of Baghdad. About 80 percent of the city was said to be under U.S. control, with insurgents pushed into a narrow corner. But the battle has claimed 22 American lives and wounded about 170 U.S. troops and violence has now spread to other Sunni Muslim areas of Iraq."

Still no word on, or names of, the dead Iraqis caused by the targetting of hospitals, first aid stations or ambulances.

Temperature Sensitive Mutant

Vancouver, British Columbia
49°15' North; 123°08' West

Good to see that former Vancouver Scrum proprietor Ian King is back at it, this time with a story on David Suzuki's past life chasing flies and his current feelings re: America.

Question is, given that Suzuki's claim to fame in the real (ie. pre-media) science world was the development of temperature sensitive gene mutations in the fruit fly D. Melanogaster, does this mean that the no longer icy polar caps are soon to be overrun with red-eyed, codpiece-wearing, pretzel-sucking fruit flies?

Helen Has Questions....

Washington, District of Columbia
38° 53' North; 77° 02' West

Helen Thomas is the grand dame of the Washington Press Corps and an Octagenerian.

And George Bush is afraid of her, because she asks questions like this:

"...Do Americans of good conscience really believe that we are making the United States more secure by bombing and killing the people of Fallujah?

......And why are our forces being killed?

......Does anyone believe that hand-picked interim Iraqi Prime Minister Ayad Allawi, on the CIA payroll for years, is a free soul?

....Did we really make war against Iraq out of the goodness of our hearts to ensure free elections for Iraqis?"

And the big one....

"..........Why are we killing Iraqis in their own country?"

Indeed.

No wonder the Twig never takes Ms. Thomas' questions during press conferences anymore.

But we have a question of our own.

When, exactly, did the Marlboro Men of BushCo become so scared of little old ladies?

Douglas Still Leads

Weyburn Saskatchewan
49° 40' North; 103° 51' West

There's still time to freep the poll for Tommy D.

Do it.

Mosul

36° 20' North; 43° 08' East
Mosul, Iraq

Looks like it's Mosul's turn to shine.

These people really are utterly contemptible and totally incompetent.

Because while BushCo and the Rovians may be able to control the Waterheads on Sunday morning TV, they absolutely cannot do anything in the real world without screwing it up totally. Hell, they can't even make a goddamn wedding cake correctly.

Wolcott gets it right. They are nothing but little big men, only picking fights they know they can win.

_______
Update: More from Josh Marshall on the swine, which is perhaps a slur to pigs everywhwere, that are really running this operation.

Bonus Update: Our protector from the 5th column has the story on the swinelet sucking at the teat with a gun in his hand down on the killing floor.

Where's Judas Now?

Fallujah Iraq
33° 28' North; 48° 48' East

"I don't want your blood money!"
Judas to Caiaphas in JC Superstar

The question is, does anybody in Fallujah want it?

Because BushCo is ready to pony up with a quite a few pieces of silver to get the natives to shut up and join the occupiers, those that aren't dead that is.

"The administration of U.S. President George W Bush has set aside $90 million to rebuild the stricken Iraqi city of Fallujah, which has come under devastating assault from U.S. forces seeking to oust insurgent fighters."

Maybe I missed it amongst the terror/murder memos, but did Alberto Gonzales already put a price on human life?

The Death of American Exceptionalism

Fallujah Iraq
33° 28' North; 48° 48' East

It seems that Americans on both side of the divide are finally waking up to the disaster that is the Iraqi occupation.

In fact, we've noticed that even freeper leaning sites are starting to post lists of the dead and mutilated from the unbelievably stupid Operation Phantom Fury.

And they are terrible lists indeed.

Unfortunately, they only include American casualties.

****

As we've noted in the last three posts there is absolutely nothing Phantomagoric about the latest seige of Fallujah.

Because it's all in your face, stand on your neck, shock and awful.

But there are no long, long, long lists of the Iraqi dead and mutilated (or even short ones).

And little Scottie McLellan, George Bush's mouthpiece, tells us why.

****

And the true Fury is not coming from the stupid swagger of American generals whipping the troops into a faux 'Onward Christian Soldier' rage of moral blindness and abject hubris.

Instead it's coming from the Iraqi population. And this is the general population, not the theocrats, the dead-enders, the terrorists or the insurgents.

Riverbend will give you the latter story. Her latest post is worth reading very slowly, but if you're pressed for time you need only read the last bit:

Rumsfeld: "The Rule of Iraq assassins must end..."
Riverbend: "I couldn't agree more: Get out Americans."

And Now The Ambulances

Fallujah Iraq
33° 28' North; 48° 48' East

Hospitals First.

First Aid Stations Second.

And now the Ambulances, as reported in the Guardian:

"....Sami al-Jumaili, a doctor at the hospital who escaped arrest when it was taken by US troops, said the city was running out of medical supplies and only a few clinics remained open.

"There is not a single surgeon in Falluja. We had one ambulance hit by US fire and a doctor wounded," he told Reuters. "There are scores of injured civilians in their homes whom we can't move. A 13-year-old child just died in my hands."

And what about all the 13 yr olds that don't die? How many future suicide bombers have just been born amongst them?

And while the NeanderConan Barbarian Architects of this naked agression are clearly unable to grasp the concept of cause and effect there may be a few of them who will be forced to come to grips with it if it is put another, slightly more biblical, way:

"You reap what you sow."
Hosea 8:1-10:15

No Help Too Small....

Fallujah Iraq
33° 28' North; 48° 48' East

.....that it can't be bombed.

Yesterday we reported that hospitals in Fallujah were being targetted.

Now the LA Times, in an A1 story, provides evidence that makeshift first-aid stations are being bombed.

"...Dr. Hamid Mohammed, speaking from a makeshift clinic that is serving Falloujans after U.S. and Iraqi forces took over Fallouja General Hospital early Monday, said that 15 dead and 20 injured people had been brought to the clinic.

"There are women and children among them."

That clinic was bombed this morning by the Americans, several witnesses said. It was unclear whether it was still receiving patients."

You can also find a report of the story at Democracy Now.

Soon, the Hague will not be enough.

To The Hague With Them

Fallujah Iraq
33° 28' North; 48° 48' East

We've said it before and we'll say it again.

For the Rovians and their minions the Hague is their Hades.

And now, according to the New York Times, they know it.

"It was the second time in six months that a battle had raged in Falluja. In April, American troops were closing in on the city center when popular uprisings broke out in cities across Iraq. The outrage, fed by mostly unconfirmed reports of large civilian casualties, forced the Americans to withdraw.

American commanders regarded the reports as inflated, but it was impossible to determine independently how many civilians had been killed. The hospital was selected as an early target because the American military believed that it was the source of rumors about heavy casualties.

"It's a center of propaganda," a senior American officer said Sunday."

Again, they targetted a hospital, thereby depriving the civilians they are bombing of emergency care such that even more of them will be left in the rubble to die, and not because the hospital was a military target but rather because they are worried about what the doctors inside might tell the world about those very same casualties.

We're sorry but, assuming the quote is accurate (and given that the story was not written by Judith Miller we figure the odds it is are about 3:5) we are having great difficulty distinguishing the difference between this and the worst atrocities of the last century, including those perpetrated by the aggressors of World War II.

(thanks to Uncle $cam, posting on the AllSpinZone , for pointing us towards the NewPravda piece, and to Kate's StormWarning for the title)

Update: Thanks to Reader A.G. for the link to Marjorie Cohn's piece in which she lays out a detailed comparison of current US practices in Iraq and the biggest act(s) of fascism from the not so distant past.

No FDR?

Seattle Washington
47° 38' North; 123° 18' West

What if Herbert Hoover had Diebold in 1932?

Do The Right Thing

Ottawa Ontario
75° 25' North; 75° 42' West

This is no time for Canadian smugness.

So go read Mr. Good, do what he says, and then do more.

Because if we don't?

Well, let's just say that, I for one, don't want to be remembered as a reluctant fascist who was 'just following orders' a generation from now.


Update: If you want a healthy dose of smugness see John Allemang's column in today's Nov 06th Globe and Mail (it's below Mallick on F2 and behind that bloody subscription wall in Webland).

Bonus Update: It's not just Iraqi's we need to help. It's disaffected, and likely soon to be endangered, Americans too (read the 'pledges'; you'll laugh your stinkin' head off).

The Caine Mutiny Revisited

Whistler, British Columbia
49° 58' North; 123° 09' West

We've been speculating all over the place, based purely on external observations, that there are serious leaks springing in the SS Gordon Campbell.

But now it's clear that some of the holes are being punched in the rusting hull from the inside.

Because Sean Holman is reporting that some delegates at this weekend's Whistler Wingding are:

".....wearing blue and red scarves emblazoned with the words Coleman Country."

Be interesting to get a look at the raw feed of Mr. Campbell's Keynote Address to see if his eye starts twitching like Inspector Dreyfuss or, even better, he tries to release the bouts of debilitating paranoia by obsessively fondling a set of brass Queegian marbles behind the dais.

Clearly, all is not yet (way) right with the BC Liberals.

(Note to Gordo....just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they're not out to get you.)

The Melancholic Map Maker

San Francisco, CA 37° 37' North; 122° 23' West

Don't know whether to laugh or cry about this one.

Do know, however, that there is no Jesus like a fauxJesus.

Unless, of course, you stumble on the real thing somewhere like, say, in the Candlestick Park Outfield circa 1963.

Big Grover and Little Gordo

Kamloops, British Columbia
50° 40' North; 120° 20' West

Big Grover Norquist, the Neandercon King who gives Karl Rove his marching orders, is the guy who came up with the idea of chronically underfunding public programs such that they eventually, shrink, curl, cringe and atrophy to the point where the public will perceive them as being so useless that they start screaming for them to be taken one by one, into the bathroom to be drowned in the tub.

Clearly, it is very difficult to ignore the fact that this recent business of creating a phony 'nursing crisis' that triggered the outsourcing of surgeries from St. Paul's Hospital is the 2nd hand around the neck of our own cherished Public Health Care system (the first hand was the jacking-up of MSP premiums).

But that was expected.

What wasn't expected was the fact that Little Gordo and his minions would decide to drown our wild salmon in their own excrement by shrinking the funding to rebuild BC's forest industry-destroyed rivers and streams to just 20% of its 2001 (ie. NDP-funded) levels.

And now it is well known wacko, way gone lefty, and eco-terrorist, Provincial Auditor General Wayne Strelioff (and accountant!) who is calling the Campbell government out on this issue because he, Strelioff, is very concerned that the wild Salmon will be soon be gone forever.

Repeating. Forever. As in..... For All Time.

All because of a strangulation strategy that has saved a measly $40 million a year out of the Provincial Salmon Conservation Program (that's approximately 4% of the two week short, '24-Hour-Party People' 2010 Olympic Budget).

Of course none of this really matters though because, sure as a vengeful and spiteful god made sour little green apples, the Ferret's $30 million dollar Whirlitzer has already been programmed for an early spring photo-op on some Sandspur near Kamloops where the Thompson meets the Fraser. There, under the glare of a halogen-backlit, faux groundhog day sky, Mr. Campbell will announce a brand spanking never been seen before, better than ever, New Era, scientifically disproven, $1.01743 million pilot program to have Maximus manage the outsourcing of Stikine Salmon to the Fraser/Georgia Straight Watershed that will be assisted by jetboat-propelled tourist attractions carved into the canyon cliffs at 10 km intervals (fully equipped with gameboys and wireless internet access and rented out in US dollars unless, of course, the latter falls below par by then, in which case they will switch to Euros....just like BigOil which is rumored to be a major corporate sponsor of the program).

And Johnny VanD has likely already had a private moment with the Premier and told him not to worry because his staff will be sure to shake the sea-lice off the farmed Atlantic Salmon that they will truck in for the event, and the cameras.

(Paul Willcocks has the measured and balanced scoop on this story. Me, I'm more steamed about the thing than Rafe Mair with downrigger hooks stuck in his thumbs.)

Gloating is One Thing, But....

Dieboldville OH 33° 33' North; 45° 78' West


.....Suggesting that yesterday's result affirms the right of BushCo to repudiate everything they have botched, mostly on purpose, during the last four years is quite another.

Because no matter what the smug pundits, including some pretty sharp boys in Canada, have to say, Planet Rove is still a place.....

1) Where no healthcare is great healthcare....

2) Where mounting Stop Loss Orders do not signal a back door draft.

3) Where instituting draft boards and forced high school registrations for special service do not signal preparations for a real draft.

4) Where sending ill-equipped troops into harms way for no good reason at all is supporting the troops.

5) Where a war hero is a war coward.

6) Where a war coward is not a coward because of midnight kerning.

7) Where anti-science is the best science.

8) Where global warming is actually an ingenious Madison Avenue ad campaign for air conditioners.

9) Where puppet regimes are democracies.

10) Where $50 dollar barrels of oil are really $25 dollar barrels of oil because the extra $25 dollars are actually going to Halliburton and KBR, which is good for the economy.

11) Where outsourcing is good for you, especially if you've lost your job because now you're an entrepeneur.

12) Where burger flipping is really high-tech manufacturing.

13) Where morality is the 4 G's....Guns, Gays, Grizzlies and God

14) Where no child left behind means that dumb kids are expelled so they won't be counted.

15) Where affirmative action means that only dumb rich kids get a free pass to Yale and Harvard.

16) Where deficits don't matter because Reagan proved it.

17) Where love is hate.

18) Where family values means putting leashes on your kids.

19) Where fraternity hazing is torture.

20) Where torture is not torture as long as you've written yourself a memo saying torture is not torture.

21) Where human rights are wrongs.

22) Where the Hague is Hades.

23) Where 100,000 deaths don't count, because dead people are free.

24) Where forced loyalty oaths are termed freedom of expression.

25) Where crypto-fascism is no longer cryptic

26) Where lying is just another word for rhetorical asymmetry.

27) Where really, really lying is really the truth.

28) Where the truth is irrelevant as long as you win.

29) Where a man who strangles you in the bathtub is your friend and hero.

Oh, and one more thing....as our guitar player from Coquitlam makes clear, it is no longer possible to pin the 'Wheres' listed above on the Rovians and the Gloating Repudiators alone, because those Wheres are now a wholly-owned subsidiary of the 50 million plus Americans who punched their ballots red yesterday.

All of them.

Swim Sideways

Geographic Center of a United Cascadia
Redway California 40° 07' North; 123° 49' West
Wed 9:14am

Wasn't going to post today, but when I got to the Student Union to buy my morning bagel I traded election condolences with the young woman behind the counter and then, as she was giving me my change, the inspirational sounds of the Indigo Girls 'Closer to Fine' began blasting from the big speakers high on the wall.

And I was struck dumb by the fact that that kid will be my kid in a few years.

So now is not the time to give in to the Undertoad.

****

But still.....

Looks like those currents pulling things down at the moment are very, very strong.

And if Kerry does concede politically, here's hoping that the legal challenges proceed until things are thoroughly investigated. And perhaps more importantly, let's hope that the next generation of Mencken's, Morrows, Hersh's, and dare I say Thompson's, are out there ready to root out any true evidence of voter suppression and dirty tricks wherever they are hidden.

I'd suggest Naomi Klein for the job, but the US is not big enough for her. She's got the whole world to work on.

****

Something else became very clear to me last night as I moved around the Net commiserating with like minded folks while endlessly dragging the mouse over that bloody CSPAN map.....

and that is....

Blogistan is not enough.

We've got to do more than preach to the converted to make the change, and that includes the coming election in British Columbia.

In other words, we've gotta change direction and swim sideways, as fast and as hard as we can, to get out of this damnable Riptide that threatens to sweep us all, and I do mean all of us, out to sea.

Watch Out For the Undertoad

Cleveland Ohio 41°25' North; 81° 52' West
10:43pm Tuesday

Apparently the big blue wave is down beneath the surface, hidden in the provisionals and absentees.

Ignore the Networks, especially FauxNews.

This will not be decided tonight.

Update 11:38pm Tuesday: John Edwards just made it official. There will be 'No Surrender' in 2004.

Bit of A Lull

Palm Beach Florida 26°41' North; 80° 07' West
7:34pm Tuesday PST


OK.

Looks like the seas have calmed a bit. Maybe has something to do with all those absentee ballots in Florida, as many as 250,000.

And Ohio may come down to provisional ballots.

Update: 11:30pm Tuesday: kos says there may be a million votes still to be counted in Florida.

Break Out The Boogie Boards!

Scranton Pennsylvania: 41° 20' North; 75° 44' West
4:20pm Tuesday PST

Based on exit polls and early returns Zogby calls it 311 Electoral Votes for Kerry (270 needed to win).

Grab the Wave!

Whitecaps Forming?

Honolulu Hawaii: 21° 20' North; 157° 55' West
Noon PST Tuesday

First exit polls suggest Swings are going Kerry

PA 60/40 Kerry
OH 52/48 Kerry
WI 52/43 Kerry
FL 51/48 Kerry

Tsunami building off on the horizon for arrival at 6pm Pacific?

Kerry Goes Surfing

Dayton Ohio: 39° 54' North; 84° 12' West

Pollsters that actually get things right once in awhile, people like John Zogby, have it as a dead heat late on election eve.

Now, the thing to remember is that Bush historically polls 5% above his actual numbers (ie. in Sports Action/Betting parlance take BushPoll - 5). A good example is the Presidential race four years ago when Gore actually won the popular vote despite the fact that CNN's last polls before the election went like this:

" The new CNN/"USA Today" Gallup Tracking Poll results are being released at this hour. It shows George W. Bush with 48 percent, Al Gore 43 percent, Ralph Nader with 4 percent, Pat Buchanan with 1 percent."

So take that 5% and give it to Kerry, then take all that youth/first time vote, take all the mobilized get out the vote campaigns in Swing States, and you've got a wave for Kerry to ride, a wave that will build into a Tsunami as the world-wide absentee and early voter ballots start to be counted.

It takes 270 electoral votes to win.

We, the Gazetteers, figure Kerry will win Ohio and thus will not even need Florida this time around, but if he does it'll be a 300 vote wall of water.

____
Update Mon Nov. 1st 11:30pm: Here's hoping for that landslide, not for the gloat factor, but instead to prevent the execution of a 'November Surprise' which would be little more than an anti-election litigation diversionary slaughter of innocents in Fallujah that is being planned right now, as we type, by BushCo.

Update Tues Nov. 2nd 6:42am: Appears the slaughter of his own people in Fallujah is in the puppet's hands; While President Ghazi al-Yawe is against it,Prime Minister Pinocchio (Allawi) says time is 'running out' for the resistance. The interim constitution says the bombing/killing/maiming must be sanctioned by the Iraqis, which is little more than wafer-thin, anti-Hague protection for Messers. Rumsfeld, Bush and Cheney et al.