Sunday, February 01, 2015

I, Curmudgeon.

TheWayTheRealWorldActually
CouldWorkVille


Last week was another one spent climbing in and out of cigar tubes to get to and from the science geek bunker.

Anyway, with respect to the actual travelling...

For awhile I tried my best to use that airline with all the 737's.

But I'm telling you, all that cutesy, nicey nice stuff drove me crazy.

It would seem that I like to be ignored by the former monopoly mongers in the blue suits.

But I'm telling you (again), I will never, ever ever step onto one of their 777 'three cabin' planes again.

And neither should you.

Why?

Because they have stuffed more than a hundred extra seats into their economy class.

As a result there are 458 seats on the bloody things. By way of comparison, American Airlines'  has 304 seats on their lucky sevens.

So.

How did the fine folks at Air Canada do that?

By adding an extra seat in every row (there are now 10 instead of 9) and by adding more than 10 new rows.

That's how.

One of the stewardi working the unbelievably narrow aisle next to me in the ridiculously overcrowded third cabin came within a hair of having a real live breakdown when somebody accidentally bumped into his cart and knocked one of the soft drink drawers to the floor.

It was five hours of pure madness, pre-saged by the bizarrity of a 'zoned' loading process that began a full hour before the scheduled departure.

Hmmmmmm....

One can only wonder how long it will be before they start offering up 'dream sleep specials' wherein you agree to be pre-flight roofied so that you can then be horizontally stacked on top of your nearest neighbours in your very own soft drink-type drawer for the duration.

That way I reckon the former monopoly mongers could probably fit 1258 passengers on their next generation wide bodies.

And in the end you would walk away from the post-flight recovery room with little more than a slight hangover and 1/32 the frequent flyer miles of the fine folks up front who never, ever pay for their own seats.

Or some such thing.


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9 comments:

Hugh said...

You were lucky you got to be inside.

My last flight I had to hang onto the wing. I didn't even get a snack.

cfvua said...

The good Mr Bateman has chosen University folks as his next smear target for their excessive costs. (His opinion) Doesn't sound like your third cabin experience qualifies as extravagance. I wonder what part of the aircraft he sits in if he ever has to fly for either his duties or recreation. Or anyone else that is a member of his fine federation with no elected board members. Meanwhile on hugely subsidized natural production he says nothing. Glaring double standard.

Anonymous said...

They need to get those recaro seat upgrades that are thinner
And no recliners!

karen said...

Hmm. Same planes, 100 more passengers.
That makes me wonder all kinds of things. Are there more attendants for these 100 more passengers?
Have they decreased baggage allowances to make up for the greater weight of 100 passengers?
Are those planes built for a load like that?

I question the safety of this. It doesn't surprise me though. My anecdotal experience of the airline in question confirms their rumoured motto: A/C: We're not happy till you're not happy.

PS. Happy to see you posting!

West End Bob said...

Remember the days when flying was actually a rather enjoyable experience, RossK?

It's been WAY too long - Now the thought of a flight anywhere makes me nauseated . . . .

Anonymous said...

You couldn't pay me enough to fly A/C.

We'll be coming home courtesy of Air Transat. We can fly 2 adults, a cat and a dog one way for less than Air Canada quoted me to fly just my dog.

GAB

cfvua said...

Meant to say natural gas production.

scotty on denman said...

I avoid commercial passenger aircraft like the plague---I mean, I don't LIKE the plague, I avoid them BECAUSE of the plague, a sundry name for the large variety of respiratory contagion, grouchiness and sad-eyed resignation that I don't wanna catch.

Took the bus from Vic to Van (downtowns). Required to wear a simple hospital face-mask, I told my waiting squeeze of a touch of self consciousness about it and she told me the only reason people might double-take or gawk is that I'm not Chinese. Sure enough, got the looks and wide berth in white-bread Vic, but pushed through collegial masked crowds once at the Big Smoke.

They get all weird at the airport, though, even though I'd prefer a properly fitted half-face respirator before getting into one of those incubating sardine cans they call aircraft these days.

I'm so happy you survived. Good luck.

e.a.f. said...

those super packed flights will only lead to supersized problems. Like how do you take a kid to the bathroom past the cart. On long flights people are supposed to move so the don't get blood clots. not to mention the increase of "air rage" in these types of conditions.

Give me an old fashioned 737 any day.