Sunday, July 06, 2014

If The Geniuses At Corus Are Really Interested In Saving 'NW...

...Who Should They Hire In The Morning Slot?

First, just in case you missed it, according to Harvey-O, the anti-Frosty is apparently packing it in:

...CKNW’s Philip Till has announced he’s leaving the radio station at the end of July...


Who should the geniuses hire as the replacement?


I've thought long and hard (well, not really) about who around here just might be able to get me to turn my dial back to 980 in the morning.

And I can only think of one name that the geniuses could throw money at that could possibly get me to do such a crazy thing.

And that would be...

...Stephen Quinn.

I mean, think about it.

Mr. Quinn has already proven that he actually knows what is going on in this town at a whole lotta levels, from the most trivial to the most important (and everything in-between).

I mean, who else knows who plays the glockenspiel for 'Hey Ocean!' and knows where Penny Ballem keeps the secret key to the inner sanctum at 12th and Cambie.

And Quinn is actually funny in a subversive, Frosty-ish sort of way.

And he even knows how to run a contest, not to mention let fly with a memorable monicker that cuts to the quick when needed (remember Spam-A-Lot!).

And the best part if this were to happen?

Having a know-something like Quinn, who actually listens to the people he is interviewing, stomp a know-nothing like the Puffmaster like a gong in the ratings every single day.

Am I wrong?

And for those of you who reckon that SQ would never leave the hallowed halls of the MoCo...Do not forget that he actually got his start at 'NW back in the days when it was still a real radio station...



Lew said...

Geniuses at Corus? I’m from Missouri on that one.

We keep hearing they’re attempting to appeal to the younger demographic, because the geezers are leaving and somebody has to take their place. Well, at its zenith ‘NW was top dog because us geezers had ‘NW on all day. We WERE the younger demographic. We enjoyed lively hosts, who instilled fear in politicians and corporate power brokers with their knowledgeable, probing questions. They usually had people from both sides of the given issue on at the same time and did their homework so they could effectively moderate the arguments.

We listened to live news reports from field reporters who actually investigated stories beyond the press releases issued from the legion of spin masters working on our dime. And as a diversion we could listen to hockey and football broadcasts. Even the repartee between the host and the weather or traffic reporter was magic; often repeated and discussed later at work. There was never any reason to turn the dial.

The geezers aren’t leaving because they’re getting old. They’re leaving for the same reason the younger demographic isn’t coming. Shitty programming. The hosts don’t know their stuff, and instead of having representatives on to debate issues, let them come one at a time to give their side of the story unopposed. That’s if they can even get them to come on the air. More and more politicians are just telling them they’re too busy for comment. They know, as we do, that “NW is becoming irrelevant. It’s boring and uninformative radio. They’re even playing some stupid noise in the background during traffic reports, as if that will spice them up and attract the youngsters. It doesn’t; but it does drive the geezers up the wall. Geniuses indeed!

Hire some hosts with the wit, the willy, and the will to go after the issues, provide them with some resources, including street-wise producers, and get out of the way. Build it and they will come. Age won’t matter.

RossK said...


You said this:

"...Even the repartee between the host and the weather or traffic reporter was magic"...


Check this out, straight from the mough of the Frosty one on how he went about things:

"... Frosty's day ends at 9 pm when he goes to bed. It begins at 3:30 the next morning. "I set the clock for the last possible moment. When I hear it, bam, I get up. None of that snoozing crap. I collect the jokes I've written the night before, bits of business I'll do with Neil Macrae, and I jump in the car with a handful of prunes or some kind of fruit. I listen to talk radio on the way in, syndicated talk shows on KIRO, I'll catach the 4 am news on CBS in the car. If the topic doesn't interest me, I'll flip to my classical cassettes. There's a newsman waiting for me to arrive, because I'm the best coffee maker in the building. There's a grapefuit juice for me in the fridge. I sit down and write Norm Grohman's material for the weather thing we do; it's based on stuff I learned that morning..."

Neat, eh?


RossK said...

Actually, not exactly sure what a 'mough' is, but what the heck!


Anonymous said...


I stopped listening to most programming on NW because it is predictable. But, then again, I listen to the Three Amigos because they are predictable. I find their government distillations consistently amusing...

Lew said...

RossK, I think a “mough” is what the anti-Frosty uses.

Another neat thing Frosty said was, “Then I go on at 5 am and start making a fool of myself.”

To be fair, the anti-Frosty does that part better.

Mr. Beer N. Hockey said...

My vote is Costa the fishmonger - one of the many guests to not quite fill in for Norm Grohman. I love radio and it has been sad to see the old dear dying so slowly. They really ought to re-visit and re-enliven some of their old format that worked. I.e. A young Rick Honey spinning Snoop Dogg, groovy young Canadians and the DBTs in the afternoon; someone who likes to drink at 5::00 AM in the morning like Frosty appeared to be; an old bugger playing marvelous midnight poop; you get the idea: bye Bill, bye Simi, bye guy I did not look at when Fiona shared a stage with him those many years. And bring back a sports guy with all of Bukowski's appetites and more.

I got more but that's it.